It's Friday. The eve of football land. But, before you clock out we're looking back at the past seven days of alternative football. The sort of stuff that makes this circus of a sport gloriously weird. Here are 10 things you might have missed...
Giroud 5 | Sometimes the internet is a good place to get a new chant going (see Will Grigg, see Salah/Mane). The key to a successful chant to a pop song is something short, something catchy, us football fans are simple bunch. Trying to remember three verses of a Maroon 5 song after five pre-match pints just ain't happening. Decent effort though, pal. Keep working those high notes.
You Know Nothing | A club's PR department is a stressful place in the transfer window. Clubs will go to any length to create a viral unveiling video, as we found out with Konyaspor this week when they announced Samuel Eto'o in a Game of Thrones inspired video. Does Sammy even like Game of Thrones? Does he binge-watch entire series for days on end in just his pants, eating nothing but cereal? If so, then fair enough. He's one of us.
Sliding out of the FA Cup | When your team's 3-0 down in the Cup and you're 300 miles away from home you need to make your own fun.
OG Class | Accrington Stanley's Josh Lenan with the assist, Accrington Stanley's Jimmy Smith with the beautifully looped header past the Accrington Stanley goalkeeper. Nothing's sweeter to watch than a team that have trained on a game plan all week, undo it all with a freak own goal. Glorious.
Stupidity Sevens | Henrikh Mkhitaryan can wear number 7 for Arsenal in the Premier League, but if he wears it in the Europa League the world as we know it will end. Alexis Sanchez has already worn that number in the Europa League this season, so Mkhitaryan will wear 77. And no, you've never spelt Mkhitaryan right at the first attempt. And yes, we copy and pasted it.
Dodo Doughnut | You know when you win a penalty for the first time on the latest version of FIFA, and they've changed how you take them from the last version? Yeah, that's pretty much what Giresunspor's Dodo experienced in real life this week.
Willy Wagner | Has Messi ever scored with his gentleman sausage? No? Then he's not as good as Bayern Munich's Sandro Wagner who did exactly that against his old club Hoffenheim. "[The goal] was a mixture of this area. I do not want to go into that now," explained Wagner, pointing to little Wagner. "My best part might have been involved, but I'm not sure anymore. It just went so fast. It was very pleasant." We hear you Sandro, mate.
Tattoo Ticket | Hertha Berlin are offering one fan a season ticket for life in the form of a QR code tattoo. All you've got to do is tell the club why you deserve it. One way of stopping people sharing season tickets we suppose. Worth pointing out that we haven't bothered to read the small print. The club could well insist on the tattoo being on your forehead to prevent queues at the turnstile. But unlikely.
Gaming Like Gnarby | All fun and games until your battery needs charging and you're trying to play 2 feet away from the screen.
Q-P-Who-R-Ya? | Remember Barkley Minguel-Panzo, QPR fans? No? That's because he never played for you. He's just signed for Lithuanian second division side Panevėžys, with his new club proudly referencing his 45 goals in 36 matches for QPR in their press release. His Wiki page backs that up, but he's definitely still never played for QPR.
Wherever you're playing or watching this weekend, try to keep this beautiful game, beautifully weird. Have a good one...
