There’s been all sorts going on in the world of football this week, from derby gaffs to shocking cases of hair envy, but surely with Luka Modric breaking the decade-long Ronaldo-Messi hold on the Ballon d'Or, there’s only one place to start, right?
Better things to do – Neymar's invite to the Ballon d'Or must've got lost in the post, for as the prestigious awards ceremony was taking place he was busy streaming his latest Call of Duty sesh on Twitch. Well, if you know you're not going to win...
Pickford x Jordan collab – Keepers have it tough. If they mess up, it usually ends up costing the team, and no one knows that better this week than England's number 1, Jordan Pickford, after his 95th minute gaff handed Liverpool all three points in the Merseyside derby. Cue a sentence of mass humiliation via twitter.
Goalkeeper's best friend – Following the Merseyside derby, Everton's hunt for a new goalkeeper took them all the way to Argentina, where a young hopeful showed his credentials in a third division match between Defensores de Belgrano de Villa Ramallo and Juventud Unida. What were we saying about Pickford's howler?
Watch this – As a thank you for helping him become Serie A's top scorer last season, Inter captain Mauro Icardi bought all of his teammates a Rolex each. Not a bad little Christmas bonus that, is it?
Bottoms up – Tensions were high as Port Vale met Stoke U21 in the EFL Trophy in a rare Potteries derby, dubbed 'El Ceramico'. Missiles were launched onto the pitch, but Port Vale's Luke Hannant had the perfect response, executing some perfect control on a bottle of Carling before drinking it while doing a Fortnite dance. Have that Stoke fans.
When it doesn't hit the fan – Appears Luke Emery just couldn't wait till half time this week as things got messy when Eynesbury Rovers hosted Daventry this week. Would hate to be the Eynesbury groundsman.
Soft doesn't cut it – Next time you see a player felled through minimal but definitive contact in the box, spare a thought for Hearts' Peter Haring. Liam Gordan, your Oscar's in the post.
Hairy stuff – Just Matteo Guendouzi enjoying Arsenal's win over Spurs by hanging out of the car window with all the enthusiasm of a Cocker Spaniel on his way to the beach.
Kopa Kid – Staying with the hair theme and fresh off winning the inaugural Kopa trophy at the Ballon d'Or awards this week, Kylian Mbappe stepped out with a new do. Or don't, depending on your perspective.
Get behind this – Ending on a festive note, this is quite simply the greatest Christmas song you'll hear this festive period. Has there been a better line than Jedinak, Belotti, Stam, Eder Carew? You'll be singing that for the rest of December...
Enjoy...
