Football is well and truly back, and with it comes a whole raft of weird stuff that you might have missed this week, including the goalkeeping situation at Liverpool, an honest assessment of the Vitality stadium, and one thing you should never do on the pitch. Let’s go…
Adil, Ram-it – Fair to say that this summer hasn't quite matched the heights of last year for the World Cup winner. Still, could be worse. Not sure how exactly, but surely it could be...
Kloppy Balboa – That is the face of a man who signed this player for the sole purpose of being able to do this impression. Look at him, he's had that lined up for months.
Auntie Ali & Uncle Ade – Let's not forget about their three sons too, Trent, Alexander and Arnold.
Injury Update – Sticking with the Liverpool keeper situation and it seems the Brazilian's injury was not as bad as first feared...
Wrong Song – Not awkward at all. His Barca career never recovered from this moment.
Taking The Mickey – This is 100% true. He shortens it down to Ney apparently. Dani-mation Alves, however, is yet to be confirmed as accurate.
The Salford Salmon – Word is that the Scottish FA are checking this chaps eligibility as they feel he may bring something to their front line.
Ander-Slalom Diaz – Not taking anything away from this brilliant effort, but you just know that Diaz has zero assists to his name.
Premier In – What's the biggest room at the Vitality? The room for some stadium upgrades, that's what.
Fact It Right Up – Keown showing his credentials.
Free Food – Forest Green Rovers have established themselves as the first-ever Vegan football club. Invention levels of the chant from the Walsall fans turned to 11.
Route One – Newcastle's Plan B under Steve Bruce this season. Who are we kidding... Plan A all day long.
Not On The Pitch – The referee's a w****r....
Lost count there. Busy week...
